When Values Collide
I received a call this week from a friend who thanked me for resharing one of their social media posts. The call wasn’t really about the post. The call was about me seeing them and amplifying their message. It was about supporting them during a time when they feel targeted by what’s happening on the national stage. With the new administration making big and quick changes, there are bound to be a wide variety of feelings. While some in our community are happy with some of the changes, we know that many are feeling the weight of the executive orders and rhetoric being pushed as they come into conflict with our values.
Individuals and groups are feeling so targeted that the exhaustion and fear is overwhelming, and the thought of fighting for the right to exist is too much. Yet here we are. How do we support each other and offer leadership during this time of radical system changes too numerous to count? I believe that we have an opportunity to practice our leadership and thrival skills as we navigate the next four years.
Personally, I’m severely conflicted right now about using Meta products. On the one hand, it is where many of my people are. WhatsApp and FB Messenger are convenient for staying connected to my family overseas; I leverage Instagram to post and re-post critical information; I follow content creators who correct the lies and misinformation; and I find comfort in creators sharing beautiful artwork in support of those being targeted. Facebook provides critical spaces for private groups to create a safe place to ask questions, share vital information, and offer comfort and community to those who feel alone. At the same time, the head of Meta is joining the call to disenfranchise those who are different from him. He is shifting his approach to align with the new administration and has changed the rules to specifically limit safety for all who are not members of the dominant culture. He seems to believe that his financial success and privilege afford him the authority on truth.
How do we hold these very complex and competing truths while trying to navigate this new reality when our friends and family are being targeted, and we feel helpless? Here are the things I know:
1) The goal of the current administration is for us to be overwhelmed and perpetually distracted. We saw this tactic in 2016 and it is even worse today. If they overwhelm us now, we might get tired and miss the significant, quiet work being done that strips key rights and the ability to fight back. It’s critical to first protect yourself and then stay current on areas where you can make a difference. Stop yourself from doom scrolling, stay focused on what you can do here and now. This is going to be a marathon, not a sprint. You don’t have to participate in every battle, particularly if you are being targeted. Engage when you are able and step back when you need. (Message adapted from Meena Harris - @meena and Brittany Packnett - @mspackyetti- posts on Instagram)
2) Stay focused on your piece. What can you do right where you are? Stay focused on the local and what you can impact, particularly when the bigger stage of country, or the world, feels overwhelming. Where can you make a difference in your neighborhood, city, or state? For example, support small independent businesses owned or run by targeted communities (LGTBQIA+, black, immigrant, and women, to name a few). If we each do our part locally, it will make a difference in the long run.
3) Support your people who are hurting, scared, and exhausted from the attacks after only a few days of a new administration. Amplify voices. Comment and share social media to help the algorithms promote voices and messages that matter to you. Reach out and check on people. Bring people together in community. Share a meal. Do what you can to make sure your friends and family know they are loved, that you are a safe place for them, and try to bring joy into their lives (hint, it bounces back and brings joy into your life as well!)
4) Know your rights. If you are being targeted, research or collaborate with others who know what your rights are, and how to stay safe. We have many local organizations bringing people together to discuss how to stay safe and healthy, and there are many creators on social media with great advice and helpful tools. Who do you like? Let us know and we’ll put together a list!
5) Embrace community, art, and good old-fashioned face-to-face conversations with people who fill you up! Does music heal your soul? Turn it on and just sit in the healing. Does art lift your heart? Indulge in art baths. Get up to that balcony to make your list now so that when you feel at a breaking point (or even better, before you get there) pick an item off that list and practice thrival by leaning into activities that revive you. We’ll spend a lot of time over the next four years stepping on and off the dance floor of resistance, self-care is critical.
Many of us are overwhelmed and don’t know where to start. Continue to imagine what is possible. Keep your dreams at the forefront of your mind and don’t let them fade. Write them down where you will see them every day or create art that reminds you. Stay focused on the direction of those dreams because they will give you the strength to endure until it starts to get better.
It will get better.
Until then, take care and I look forward to seeing you soon.
Jeni
